and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize