Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
