there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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