people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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