The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
