My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
