I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
