she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
