I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Randomize
