i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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