I puked a lego.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
