One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
