accomplished twins. life is a go
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I came so hard my ears popped.
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