see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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