Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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