Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
