Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
