Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Randomize
