Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Randomize
