Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
