so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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