She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
