I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
There's always time for handjobs
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I'm like, not good at living.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
