The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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