He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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