that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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