he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
