I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
