you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
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