I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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