so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
