He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
