Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
only if we run a train.
done.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
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