Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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