So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
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