I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
You need a sexual gate keeper
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
