oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
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