69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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