Rock
Scissors
Fuck
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
