I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
of course. lets lasso hookers.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
