so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
