I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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