You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I've blown a few things in my day
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
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