She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
