Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
