these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
The uberlube is also flammable
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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