Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Randomize
