can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Randomize
