Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
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He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie