one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
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