Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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